Whether you're remote, self-employed, or in a busy office, loneliness can hit you in unexpected ways. It’s something I’ve experienced in different phases of my working life, and today I want to share my journey and the tips that have helped me along the way.
Overcoming Remote Work Loneliness
I’ve worked remotely in different stages of my career, and every time I forget how isolating it can be. When I transitioned to self-employment, the loneliness hit me hard—even though I thought it’d be amazing to have so much freedom. Here’s what helped me manage the isolation:
Co-working with friends: If you know other people who work remotely, set up some co-working dates at a café or library. I do this with friends, and it makes such a difference.
Go to open co-working spaces: I sometimes go to shared workspaces near my home. It’s a great way to be around people, even if you’re not interacting much.
Phone a friend while working: I used to call a friend while working remotely, and even though we weren’t chatting the whole time, it felt less lonely just knowing someone else was there.
Finding Connection in a Busy Office
It’s weird, but I’ve felt lonely even in the middle of a busy office. When I was a receptionist, surrounded by colleagues and customers all day, I still felt disconnected. If you’re in a similar position, here’s what I found helpful:
Focus on one-on-one connections: You don’t need to be friends with everyone at work. Find one or two people you vibe with. For me, having just one good friend at work made all the difference.
Take the initiative: It can be tough, but sometimes you just have to ask someone to grab lunch or coffee. I’ve done this, and while it doesn’t always turn into a close friendship, it helps break the ice.
Get involved in activities outside work: I started focusing more on hobbies and joined a few community events. Meeting like-minded people outside of work helped me feel less isolated.
Embracing Your Identity
One of the loneliest parts of my journey has been feeling like nobody around me understood what I wanted to do. When I told people I wanted to start a business or become a life coach, I was met with blank stares. That feeling of being misunderstood can make you feel even more alone. Here’s what helped me:
Seek out like-minded people: I started attending networking events and joining communities where I knew people would “get” me. Even if I didn’t talk much, just being around others with similar goals made me feel less alone.
Stay true to yourself: It’s hard when people don’t understand your career aspirations, but don’t let that make you question yourself. I learnt that the right people will support and understand you—sometimes it just takes time to find them.
Final Thoughts
Workplace loneliness is something many of us experience, but it’s not permanent—you don’t have to stay stuck in that space. Whether you’re working remotely, in a busy office, or on your own, there are steps you can take to feel more connected. Here are some key reflections to help you move forward:
Have you found your people? If not, it’s okay to acknowledge that. You might not always find them in the workplace, and sometimes the right connections are outside of work.
What are the proactive steps you can take? Think about the small things you can do—invite someone to coffee, go to a co-working space, or even just take a break in a new environment.
How can you confront these feelings head-on? Don’t avoid the feelings of loneliness. Address them and think about what you need to change.
Taking small, intentional actions can make your work life feel more supportive and fulfilling. Remember, it’s all about building connections in a way that works for you—whether at work or outside of it.
You can listen to the full episode of The Deborah Missengue Podcaston Spotify for more insights and personal stories.
